The Hardest Thing
by CheeryBroody83
Summary: AU: He knows he has to make a choice but he doesn’t know what the right choice is. He either gives up the loyal girlfriend he always wanted or the beautiful but broken girl he’s desperate to have. BL w/minor LP
1. Beautiful Disaster

**Author's Note: **_Since we've seen Nick Lachey in recent episodes, I actually listened to some of his old stuff on youtube, and then this song popped up on me and I couldn't resist. I suppose that some might hear it and think of it the opposite way that I did but I wanted to turn things around a bit. I know that Brooke has a huge selfless heart but for once, I wanted to see her putting herself first. I wanted her to go after what she wanted instead of giving everything up for those around her. So I came up with this little tale. I hope you like it and that you don't think that just because Brooke is the other woman, that she's anything like Peyton... because she never will be. _

_On another note, I know that I have plenty of stories out there that need finishing, but lately it's been very hard to find inspiration. I hate what Mark has done to this show so it's been hard for me to continue with the stories I have that pick-up from certain past episodes. It's kind of why I just wanted to write a whole new story. Something that has nothing to do with where the show has gone. Something that had a season 1 & 2 vibe to it which I hope I'm able to accomplish. I hope you enjoy it and don't hate me for not updating anything else recently.  
_

**Disclaimer: **_I own nothing you recognize. The title song is "**The Hardest Thing**" by 98 Degrees_

**Background Info: **_Season one with a few alterations. To start with, everything is the same with the Scott family. Brooke is still the rich cheer captain. The only difference is that there was never a BP friendship and Peyton was never a cheerleader, therefore, never dated Nathan. No Brooke makes Peyton a different person and vice versa. You'll see the changes in their personalities that come from not growing up together. _

**Summary: ** _AU: He knows he has to make a choice but he doesn't know what the right choice is. He either gives up the loyal girlfriend he always wanted or the beautiful but broken girl he's desperate to have._

_Lie in the Sound - Trespassers William  
Beautiful Disaster - Jon McLaughlin_

* * *

**Prologue  
**_Lie In The Sound_

It rained that night. A quiet storm outside while a stronger one raged on inside.

His touch was gentle, inexperienced as his fingers lightly skimmed down her body. The anticipation was sweet torture. She arched into his touch and released a quiet sigh of pleasure. "You're beautiful," he whispered and trailed his kisses to her breasts where he laved one nipple, then the other with languid, hot flicks of his tongue.

Hands fisted into the comforter while she worried her bottom lip between her teeth.

Every other breath she took was a moan. A quiet, throaty sound of enjoyment for the wondrous havoc he wreaked on her body.

Slow and timid, he continued the journey down her stomach until he reached the juncture between her thighs. She was hot and slick, ready for him when he slipped two fingers inside and nervously teased. "Luke…." His name was a breath… a sigh that quietly passed through her lips. "Please…" she softly begged. "Please."

_I am falling__…__ say my name and I'll lie in the sound. What is love, but whatever__…__ my heart needs around._

His weight pushed her down into the mattress, pinning her between the softness of the bed and the hard muscle of his body. "Open your eyes," he gently coaxed with lips only a breath away from hers. "Please." It was his turn to beg as eyes slowly fluttered open and blue met hazel. "See me. Only me," he whispered.

_Oh but I know what I need._

In one swift thrust, he buried himself to the hilt.

Both cried out at the feel of him filling her body with his. He marveled that they were one. That he was inside of her, a part of her in the most intimate of ways. "I see _you_," she murmured and closed her eyes as he slowly pulled out and pushed back in. "Luke…" she whispered over and over as his body moved against hers.

Their lips were never far apart, sharing the same breaths while he passed three words from his mouth to hers. "I love you."

_And it needs you too much now._

Her eyes opened and she stared into his, locked as something indescribable passed between them. It lasted only a second, and in the next moment the beautiful depths were locked away again while she urged him to move faster… harder. He could do nothing but comply as she rocked her hips in time to his movements. Arching… crying… falling as he pushed her over that final precipice into oblivion.

----------

**Chapter One - Beautiful Disaster  
**

_She's giving boys what they want, tries to act so nonchalant,  
Afraid they'll see that she's lost her direction.  
She never stays the same for long,  
Assuming that she'll get it wrong.  
Perfect only in her imperfection._

"This year we've decided to make participation in the school's history fair mandatory for all juniors. Something I'm sure you're all very pleased about," Mr. Donahue said amidst groans from the entire class. "Alright, settle down."

From where he sat in the back of the room, Lucas Scott glanced over at his girlfriend of five months and mouthed "_Be my partner._"

"I will be choosing your partners," Mr. Donahue continued.

Peyton shot her boyfriend a disappointed look as their teacher walked around the room handing out slips of paper.

"There are 22 students and 11 different topics. Match your topics and you've got yourself a partner," he explained and handed Lucas one that said _Kennedy._ "Once you've paired up, you can decide to keep the topic or pick something else from that same decade. I'll need your final answer though by the end of class tomorrow so we'll be taking a trip down to the library so you can do some research."

Once most of the topics had been distributed, Lucas walked over to Peyton, hoping she had the same one as he did. "Stock market crash," she said as he held up his own slip of paper.

"Yes!" Haley James uttered from nearby as she walked up and looped her arm through Peyton's. "I thought I was going to end up with a completely useless partner," she admitted shamelessly.

"What... you mean like me?" Nathan teased as he joined the group, flashing a paper that said, _Walk on the moon._

_"_No," Haley blushed. "I meant someone like Tim or Cheerleader Barbie over there," she said, gesturing to the class clown and the varsity cheer captain. The former sat laughing with a couple other guys from the school's basketball team, oblivious to anything else while the latter stared at the topic Mr. Donahue had just handed her.

"Who still hasn't found their partner?" the teacher asked, breaking up the various conversations throughout the room.

Lucas raised his hand and saw his brother, Jake Jagielski and the cheerleader in question do the same. "Whoops," Haley muttered as Jake walked over to Nathan, leaving Brooke Davis holding a little slip of paper baring the single word, _Kennedy._ "Good luck," she added as blue eyes met hazel. "With a partner like her, you're gonna need it."

----------

Each pair found a quiet spot in the library to sit and flip through their text books with the hope of deciding on a topic. Brooke Davis and Lucas Scott were no exception. Tucked away on the second floor, each quietly read through pages of information on the former president.

As the minutes ticked by, Lucas wondered if his partner was still reading or if she had just spaced out.

"So what do you think?" he asked, breaking through the silent reverie.

"He has a lot to say about courage," Brooke replied, only glancing up briefly.

She was different than he had assumed.

On the sidelines she stood cheering and smiling, leading her squad from one chant to the next. At the few parties he'd been to at Nathan's house, she drank with the best of them, danced to every song she liked and took a different boy upstairs every time the mood struck her. But here and now, sitting quietly in the library with her bottom lip between her teeth, she was different. Almost lonely.

"Are you okay sticking with this topic or was there something else you wanted to do the project on?"

Brooke shrugged. "It doesn't matter one way or the other to me. You can pick and I'll just go along with it."

Frowning, Lucas struggled with the words sitting on the tip of his tongue. "Look, I..." he faltered as she met his gaze with her hazel eyed stare. "This project counts for half our grade this semester and I just... I need a partner that's going to contribute. You know, someone who..."

"Is more than just Cheerleader Barbie, right?" she finished when he lost the words he intended to say.

"No," Lucas quickly corrected, drawing the gaze of a nearby pair. "That's not what I meant."

"But it's what you thought, isn't it. What all your friends think," Brooke said and rolled her eyes when he couldn't bring himself to lie. "Whatever. It's not like it matters what you think of me anyway." Gathering her books, she stuffed them in the red backpack she carried. It was the exact shade of her lipstick, Lucas couldn't help but notice. "Decide which parts of the project you trust me with and let me know tomorrow. We can work on it separately," she shrugged and turned to walk away when Lucas reached out a hand to stop her.

Brooke kinked her eyebrow curiously but said nothing else. "I'm sorry."

"I'm sure you are," the brunette replied. This time when she began to walk away, Lucas let her.

"What was that all about?" Haley asked as she and Peyton appeared, seemingly out of nowhere. His girlfriend held an aged reference book against her t-shirt clad chest, blocking the image of some late 70's rock band. The expression on her face was expectant, glancing between him and the retreating figure who neared the stairs.

"Luke?"

"Nothing, she just..." he trailed off as a wave of disappointment washed over him. Lucas tried hard to not ever judge a book by its cover but the brief, hurt expression in Brooke's eyes told him that he'd done just that. "Nothing."

----------

Brooke Davis was a girl on a mission.

"Oh, come on, Principle Turner. The cheer squad has been wearing the same uniforms for the last five years," she informed and set a brightly colored brochure down on his desk. "Even though our squad has won best choreography at the Classic for the last two."

Sighing, the principle glanced at the brochure featuring the Ravens cheer squad on the front cover. Front and center was their captain... Brooke Davis, and sitting beside her was a trophy nearly half her size.

"Does it really seem fair to you that our football team gets new jerseys every year even though they haven't won a game since Earl Matthews graduated six years ago?" she questioned, pinning the principle with a determined stare. "Yet our squad is known throughout the state and has to keep showing up to the classic in the same outdated uniforms."

If she had to listen to Claire Young brag about Bear Creek one more time, she swore she'd knock the girl out with the nearest trophy.

"I understand your request, Miss Davis, but I'm sorry," Turner denied, returning Brooke's attention to the present. "There just isn't money in the budget to outfit the cheerleaders in new apparel."

"Well, how much money _is_ in the budget?"

"Excuse me?" His tone incredulous, Brooke rushed to pitch a new idea.

"I'm just saying," she carefully began. "That if there isn't enough, maybe we can make some kind of compromise. You know, have a few fundraisers or something and then the school can match whatever money we make."

"I don't know," he hedged.

"Oh, come on, sir," she cajoled. "I'll even find a good deal on the uniforms we get."

"I have no doubt you can argue the prices down," Turner said dryly.

"So do we have a deal?"

Sighing in defeat, he nodded. "Yes, Miss Davis... you have a deal."

"Yes!" she smiled widely. "You won't regret it, sir. I promise we'll raise a ton of money."

"I'm sure you will. Now if you'll excuse me, I have other business to attend to," he said and handed back the Cheer Classic brochure.

Grinning widely, Brooke strolled out of the office and bumped right into the boy she'd been avoiding since 3rd period history. The smile slipped from her face as she watched him glance at the door she'd just walked out of. "Brainless and always in trouble," she said, guessing at the direction of his thoughts. "You really lucked out in the partner department, huh?"

"So did you," Lucas replied. "You ended up with a judgmental jerk."

Her lips twitched with a hint of amusement before rolling her eyes. "Give me your pen," she demanded and plucked the object from his hand. Holding onto his wrist, she wrote a number on his palm. "Call me later and we'll set up a time to work out the details. Maybe if you aren't too unbearable, we can work on this project together."

He closed his fingers against his palm and said, "I really am sorry."

"Yeah, well..." she trailed off as she spied a curly haired blonde watching from a distance. "Looks like I'm not the only one you'll be apologizing to today," Brooke stated, gesturing to where his girlfriend leaned against her locker. "Good luck," she said while Lucas considered the fact that she was the second girl that day to wish him luck.

"I'd ask what that was about but you'd probably just say nothing," Peyton said as Lucas walked up to her.

"It was just history project stuff," he replied and reluctantly opened his hand when Peyton began to pluck at his fingers. "We didn't really get off to a good start earlier."

"I remember," the blonde quietly said. "I guess you fixed that now, though, huh?"

"Peyton..."

Lucas couldn't remember ever seeing his girlfriend jealous. Sure, she'd been a little wary of Haley at first but after realizing that the two were more like brother and sister than anything else, she quickly came around to the friendship. Since then there had been no cause for jealousy and from his perspective, Lucas couldn't see one now either.

"I'm sorry," she apologized before he could say anything else. "It's just a little weird. Seeing you standing so close to her, watching her write her number down on your hand. I guess I just..." she frowned. "I don't know. I guess it just... felt weird."

There was vulnerability in her green eyes as she looked up at him and Lucas couldn't help the twinge of guilt he felt.

His whole exchange with Brooke had been innocent enough but staring down at Peyton, he started to feel like he'd done something wrong just by talking to her. Especially since it provoked such a foreign response from the girl he spent years pining for. A girl who'd spent the last five months making his fantasy a reality.

"Peyton," he began once more when the overhead bell silenced whatever it was he planned to say. "Come on," he offered, smiling coaxingly. "I'll walk you to your next class."

And just like that, she felt secure again. The familiar comfort of having Lucas' arm around her shoulders was enough to squelch the irrational jealousy she felt when she saw Brooke Davis smiling up at him.

She had nothing to worry about, Peyton told herself. Lucas wasn't like other guys. She could trust him. He spent years trying to get her to notice him and when she did, he spent months trying to get her to say yes to a date. He wasn't going to hurt her now. Not ever.

"I love you," she whispered and his answering smile was enough to send a swarm of butterflies fluttering around in her stomach. "Love you too."

----------

"God, they're cheesy," Nathan groaned as he came up behind Haley. Hands on her shoulders, he glanced at the couple walking arm and arm, oblivious to the chill that danced up her spine.

"They love each other," Haley managed. "What's so wrong with that?"

Shrugging, Nathan released his hold and walked around until he was facing his tutor. "Nothing, I guess. They just don't really seem like they fit."

"What are you talking about?" Haley frowned. "They're perfect for each other. They like all the same movies, books... music."

"Right," Nathan agreed. "They're like the same person. Where's the fun in that?"

"So you're saying a relationship is no fun unless the couple is always fighting and disagreeing?" she questioned.

"No," he grinned. "But it does make things interesting." Haley blushed at this and Nathan couldn't help teasing her. "Come on," he said, gently tugging on a lock of brown hair. "I have that English quiz tomorrow, and you promised to help me study for it."

"Right," Haley inwardly sighed. "Tutoring."


	2. Stand Still, Look Pretty

**A/N: **_Thank you for the enthusiastic reviews, its always nice to know that someone is enjoying what you're writing. I'm actually pretty excited about writing this story and it helps knowing that at least here, the two that are truly meant to be together will find their way in the end. _

_As for a couple questions asked, this is sort of a mix of Seasons 1 & 2. Nathan and Lucas have called a truce, which you'll learn more about later and Lucas chased Peyton like in S1. The difference, is that there is no Naley... yet. As for whether or not Lucas and Brooke get together while he's still with Peyton... I can only say that whatever happens, will be nothing like the BLP triangle. That doesn't meant that there won't be things you won't agree with, though. Sorry.  
_

_Stand Still, Look Pretty - The Wreckers  
_

_

* * *

  
_

**Chapter Two – Stand Still, Look Pretty**

_Sometimes I find myself shaking  
In the middle of the night  
And then it hits me and I can't  
Even believe this is my life_

He called that night but she didn't answer… at least not right away. Instead, she waited until almost midnight before picking up the phone and dialing his number. A voice roughed with sleep answered on the fourth ring. "Hello," he said, just as she was about to hang up.

"I guess I should've called you back sooner."

Lucas squinted at the clock for the time before asking, "Brooke?"

"Yeah, it's me," she responded in a voice just as quiet as his. "I was out at some party and didn't hear my phone ring," she explained before offering to let him get back to sleep. "We can just talk in class tomorrow."

"No, it's okay," Lucas quickly replied. "I'm awake."

"Liar."

"Awake enough," he amended.

For some inexplicable reason, Lucas felt like he had to talk to her. Maybe it was the faint sadness he heard in her offer or just the fact that she'd called him back. Either way, he wasn't ready to let her off the phone yet.

"So who throws a party on a Monday night?" he asked, stifling a yawn with his hand.

"College boys who haven't started their semester yet," Brooke replied as she tossed her high heeled sandals into the closet. Holding the phone with her shoulder, she pushed down the mini skirt she wore and asked Lucas to hold on as she replaced her halter top with an oversized t-shirt. It felt good to just relax, to get underneath her thick comforter and actually talk to someone. "Bevin's dating this guy at Duke and he invited us to some party his frat was hosting," she explained.

At the risk of sounding corny, Lucas couldn't help but ask, "And your parents are okay with that?"

He couldn't know that such a simple question would cause such sadness. Nor did she intend on letting him find out. "Sure," Brooke replied, nonchalant. "They trust me."

"Must be nice," he replied, thinking about his own mother and the fact that she'd have him on the phone if he was even a minute late for curfew. Especially when she knew he was out on a date with Peyton. Over and over, he heard her speech about safe sex and how she didn't want him following in her footsteps by becoming a teenage parent. He supposed, if it wasn't so embarrassing to talk about, she would back off if he told her that he and Peyton weren't sleeping together yet.

"Yeah… nice," she said in a voice so quiet that he almost didn't hear the words. "So this project we're doing," Brooke added before things could get too personal. "Did you decide how you wanted to split things up?" she asked and sunk even further into bed as she listened to the quiet timber of his voice.

"I thought we decided to work on it together," Lucas replied.

"We did, but… I thought you might've changed your mind," she shrugged into the darkness.

"Why?"

"I saw the look on your girlfriend's face today, Lucas. She didn't seem all that happy about us being paired up," Brooke explained, remembering the jealousy she saw marring the blonde's features. "So I thought you might've changed your mind about us working together."

"She's fine with it," Lucas lied, hoping that it wasn't audible in his voice.

The truth was that Peyton _did_ feel uncomfortable with their pairing, but there was nothing Lucas could really do about it. The project was assigned and a big part of their grade. She couldn't very well ask him to not work with his partner, even if he could see the desire to say the words when she asked about Brooke. "I'd understand if she wasn't," the hazel eyed girl admitted. "I know what people say about me. I know that at least half of it is true."

"Which half?" he found himself asking.

"You can decide that for yourself," Brooke replied and asked him once more about the project. "We should probably try to get it out of the way as soon as possible. With basketball season starting soon and the Classic coming up… we'll both be pretty busy in a couple months," she reasoned.

"It'll probably take longer than that," Lucas stated, refraining from asking whether she'd read the entire assignment. The last thing he wanted to do was offend her again.

"What do you mean?"

"It's an ongoing thing," he said. "Donahue wants weekly reports for the first two months and then bi-weekly reports until the end of the semester."

"I know that, Lucas. I read the paper," Brooke retorted. "I just meant that if we worked on it all at once, we could probably get ahead. That way we'd have advanced reports to turn in so it won't matter if we slack off when the season starts."

"Oh."

Sighing, Brooke tiredly replied, "It's like I said… I know what people say about me. The words brainless and slut seem to go hand and hand with my name." Just that day, she'd heard his best friend, Haley James, say something to that effect while she sat in the tutor center with Nathan Scott. "I'm not an honor student, Lucas. I'm not even close. But the mistakes I make are my own and I don't drag other people down with me," she quietly informed. "I'll read the pages, write the words… whatever my half of the assignment is, okay. So no worries."

"I didn't mean that you wouldn't. I just…"

"It's okay," Brooke interrupted. "But, it's getting pretty late. Why don't we talk about it tomorrow?" she suggested.

"Because I get the feeling that if I hang up, I'll lose out on the chance to get to know the real you," Lucas bravely confessed.

"Why would you want to?"

"Because," he said, struggling with the answer. The truth was that he wasn't sure why he wanted to know her. He didn't understand why this project should change more than ten years of indifference between them. Yet it did. Or at least, he wanted it to. "I guess I don't know why. I just want to," he dared to admit, only to be met with silence. "Brooke?"

"I'll talk to you tomorrow, Lucas. Goodnight."

"Goodnight," he replied to the empty sound of his room after she'd hung up the phone.

----------

The third period bell rang and one student was noticeably absent from Mr. Donahue's history class.

"So much for your grade this semester," Haley muttered as the class paired up.

Despite her assurances the night before, Brooke Davis was nowhere to be found. Lucas half wondered if it was a punishment for the things he'd said. For the bad impression he'd obviously given her. "Well, Mr. Scott… it looks like…"

"Wait… sorry… I'm here," Brooke called out as she walked in, carrying a signed note from Principle Turner. "I got held up in the office," she explained while the history teacher verified that the note was authentic. She smiled briefly as he set it down on his desk and suggested that she find her partner. "Sorry," Brooke apologized to Lucas and slid into the seat behind him.

"It's okay. We just got started."

"Good," she said while pulling her text book from her bag. This time a pink messenger that matched her nails. "So how do we begin?" she asked, holding a feather pen poised over a flower shaped notebook.

Despite the serious expression on her face, Lucas couldn't help but think of the movie, _Legally Blonde._ With the exception of Brooke being a brunette, she reminded him of Elle Woods on her first day of law school. He was smart enough though not to mention the chick flick Haley made him watch with her when it first hit theaters.

"A time-line," he suggested. "We can choose the significant points we want to write about and then outline each of those events for content."

Thoughtful, Brooke considered his words before asking, "So then we still have a ton of research to do first, huh? That way we actually know which events to choose from and then outline, right?"

Uncertainty coated her words. She bit her lip nervously, waiting for Lucas to tell her she was right or wrong. "Yeah, that'd probably be a good idea," he said and almost smiled when she let out relieved breath.

"So then what are we waiting for?" Brooke asked. "Let's hit the library."

"We can't."

"Why not?"

"Because Donahue said there's already another class in there today," Lucas explained.

"Okay," Brooke said slowly. "So then why don't we go to the city library?"

"Because we're in class."

"Yeah, but the research is _for_ class," she said as though it should've been obvious. "Besides, it's not like we're gonna skip the whole day. We'll be back in a couple of periods."

Looking around first to see if anyone heard, Lucas waited until he was sure no one was paying attention before saying, "We can't leave school. We'll get caught."

"Obviously you've never skipped before," Brooke declared and began to shove her books and papers back into her bag. "It's easy. Just wait here and I'll take care of the rest," she advised and stood up before Lucas could stop her. "Mr. Donahue," Brooke whispered, embarrassed. "May I be excused to the ladies room. I sort of have a... problem," she said, widening her eyes almost imperceptibly. "If you know what I mean."

Lucas couldn't hear what she said but he saw embarrassment color the teacher's cheeks. A second later, Brooke walked out of the room and Mr. Donahue studied the paper on his desk as if it was the most interesting thing in the world.

Not more than a minute later, a nervous freshman wearing an office pass clipped to his shirt, walked in and handed the history teacher a blue slip of paper. "Mr. Scott," he called out. "Principle Turner would like to see you."

"Me?" he and Nathan both asked while Peyton and Haley glanced between them.

"Mr. Lucas Scott," he clarified and held out the slip. Quickly stowing away his books, Lucas swung his backpack over his shoulder and reached for the note. "Use that as a hall pass if you're stopped."

"Yes sir," he agreed and shot Peyton a quick smile before following the freshman out into the hall.

"Brooke Davis said to tell you she'd be waiting outside in the parking lot," the fumbling boy whispered once they were several feet away from the classroom. "But don't worry, I promised I wouldn't tell anyone," he quickly assured.

The boy obviously had a crush on Brooke and probably would've done anything she asked of him. Lucas couldn't help but sympathize as he realized _he'd_ gone along with what she wanted too. "Thanks," Lucas replied and hurried down the hall towards the south entrance of the school. The sun's rays hit him as soon as he set foot outside and spotted Brooke's powder blue beetle waiting along the sidewalk.

Just as he closed the car's door behind him, she hit the gas and shot out of the parking lot before he could buckle his seat belt.

"Told you it'd be easy," she declared triumphantly and headed away from the school.

"Easy for you to say," Lucas retorted. "You're not the one that'll have to explain why _Principle Turner_ wanted to see me."

"Also easy," Brooke countered as they drove by his mother's cafe. Luckily, he couldn't see her through the window which meant she couldn't see him either. "Tell your friends that the cheerleaders are having a fund raiser for new uniforms and he wanted to talk to you about asking your mom to pitch in."

"Why would my mom help out?" Lucas asked, bewildered.

"Because she's a former cheer captain and she already offered," Brooke informed as she swung into the library's parking lot.

Lucas wasn't sure if it was her fast driving or her fast talking but it took him a second to process what she'd just said. "Wait, when did you talk to my mom?" he asked and had to hurry after Brooke as she closed her door and began walking up the small mountain of steps.

"Yesterday," the brunette shrugged. "I went in for coffee and she saw some fliers I had. Then she offered to help," she explained in a voice that clearly said it was no big deal. "So there's your alibi. You're off the hook."

"Wait... what?"

"And people say _I'm_ the slow one," she muttered and shook her head. "Just don't worry about it, Lucas. We'll work on the project, I'll take us back to school and everything will be fine. Trust me."

He opened his mouth to argue but one look at her annoyed expression had him snapping his lips together.

"Thank you," she said and gestured in front of her. "Now you're gonna have to show me where we're going because I've never been here before."

Lucas couldn't help it... he laughed.

----------

Third and fourth period came and went and with it was lunch, yet there was still no sign of her sandy haired boyfriend. "Do you think he's in trouble or got sent home for something?" Peyton asked when Haley appeared by her side with a lunch tray in her hands.

"He's probably in the gym again," the petite brunette guessed. "Nathan says Whitey's out for blood this year since it might be his last. They're all spending extra time in the weight room and on the court."

"Nathan says, huh?" Peyton asked, temporarily distracted by the blush that stained her friend's cheeks.

"Shut up," she muttered and lowered her head so that her curtain of hair would hide her face.

"I don't see why you won't just ask him out," the blonde admitted. "Since he and Lucas called a truce last season, he hasn't been nearly as much of an ass. Plus, unless I'm totally crazy or something, he seems to like you too."

"No he doesn't," Haley quickly refuted.

"God, Haley... take a look in a mirror sometime," Peyton declared. "You're really pretty and we both know Nathan loves that you're so brainy."

Blushing once more, Haley could only shake her head. "Taking amusement from my study habits doesn't change the fact that he only dates girls like Bevin and Theresa. Or Cheerleader Barbie."

"Oh come on, that was two years ago and he said they only went out once," Peyton reminded.

"Like that matters," Haley retorted. "From what I hear, it barely takes her an hour, much less a whole date to get a guy into bed."

"You think he had sex with Brooke?"

Shrugging, Haley replied, "He'd be the first guy to say no, if he didn't."

----------

"No. There's no way I'm doing that," Lucas declared, arms folded across his chest in defiance.

Laughing, Brooke shook her head and ignored the dark looks the librarian shot their way. "It's not that big of a deal, Lucas. It'll be the whole team, not just you," she said, though her assurances weren't convincing enough as far as Lucas was concerned. "Besides, it's for a good cause."

"No, the children's hospital is a good cause. A soup kitchen is a good cause... getting new cheerleader uniforms is not good enough to make me strip on stage."

"Who said anything about stripping? I'm just talking about undoing a few buttons, maybe dancing around a little," Brooke cajoled. "Besides, wouldn't it be a massive ego boost to stand there while girls go crazy trying to outbid each other for the chance to spend a night with you?"

"I think you have me confused with Nathan," he decided. "This is more of his thing, than mine."

Rolling her eyes, Brooke agreed, "Well, yeah... I'll ask Nathan too, but Lucas, you have to be a part of it. You're the co-captain," she reasoned and glared at the poor library worker who made the mistake of telling them to quiet down.

"You're gonna get us kicked out of here," Lucas pointed out.

"Not possible. It's a public library and guess what... we're the public."

"It doesn't quite work that way."

"Well then unless you agree to be a part of this auction, I'll just keep getting louder," Brooke warned, unconcerned with possibility that someone might actually ask them to leave.

"No. No way."

"Please?"

"No."

"Please."

"No."

Sticking her lip out, she pouted. Hazel eyes gazed up at him sadly. She leaned forward and gently took his hand in hers. "Please Lucas. It would really mean a lot to me and the rest of the squad if you agreed to help us out."

His resolve had already weakened and then she touched him. He couldn't help the tremor he felt at the first touch of her skin.

"Maybe."

Brooke smiled. As far as she was concerned, when he said maybe, what he really meant was yes.


	3. Let Me Fall

**A/N: **_Wow!! So the responses to the last chapter were amazing. I'm truly excited that you're all enjoying this. I'm soooo sorry that I made you all wait. My hard drive died and I've been waiting for my new one to arrive. I lost also almost everything so it took me a while to re-write this chapter. Hope you like because I'm not sure that I do.  
_

_Now to address a few things... to start with, I know that Haley seems pretty judgmental, but that's really how I saw her in S1, before she got to see how amazing Brooke's heart is. I also realize that there are so changes in character personalities but I'm trying to write this based on how these characters may have developed without certain friendships/relationships in their lives. Brooke will be different and so will Peyton... at least to some degree. But I hope you stick with me anyway and see how this all plays out. Thanks again for all your support!!!_

_Let Me Fall - Bethany Joy Galeotti  
_

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**Chapter Three - Let Me Fall**

_I've become much too good at being invincible  
I'm an expert at play it safe, and keep it cool  
But I swear this isn't who I'm meant to be  
I refuse to let my life roll all over me..._

The first chance Peyton got to talk with Lucas was at the end of the day. He was so busy stuffing books inside his locker that he didn't notice her appear by his side until she spoke. "Where were you this morning? I haven't seen you since history."

Ignoring the guilt he felt, Lucas carefully sidestepped the question. "Why? Did you need something?"

"My boyfriend, actually," she said, pinning him with an uncertain expression. "I thought we were gonna have lunch together. Then suddenly Turner wants to see you and you're suddenly MIA for the rest of the morning." Her green eyes were questioning and Lucas knew what she was going to ask before the words ever left her mouth. "Speaking of which, what was that all about?"

"Uniforms," he said before he could stop himself. "The cheerleaders are holding some fundraisers and Turner's asking local businesses to help. He thought that maybe I could talk to my mom for him and save him the phone call."

This time the guilt was quick and washed over him as the lie rolled easily off his tongue.

When Brooke gave him the simple out, he never imagined he'd take it. He just assumed that when Peyton or one of his friends asked, he'd be able to tell them some semblance of the truth. Yet lo and behold, he stood in the hallway lying to his girlfriend because the truth was unexplainable. Because he couldn't admit that he'd spent the morning having fun with another girl. That he'd skipped class with the best of intentions but got nothing accomplished outside of agreeing to be a prize in a boy-toy auction.

"So how come you never came back to class?"

Lucas shrugged, feigning nonchalance. "I figured Brooke wasn't coming back which meant there wouldn't be much for me to do with our project. So I just went down to the gym and shot around until fourth period."

"What about lunch?"

Finally something he could answer truthfully. "Weights. Tim and I got in a few reps each."

Peyton was frowning, though Lucas could tell by her expression that she believed his story. She wasn't happy about it, but she believed it. "Okay... well since you already got in some quality time with Tim and the basketball court, how about actually spending the afternoon with your girlfriend?"

"I can't?" Lucas closed his eyes regretfully, knowing that when he opened them, Peyton would be frowning back at him again. "I promised my mom I'd fill in for Haley since she's taking the afternoon off to wait in line for tickets to The Wreckers concert."

"Right," Peyton acknowledged. "I forgot about that."

Shutting his locker, Lucas settled the straps of his backpack on his shoulders before giving Peyton his full attention. "I'm sorry. Today's been a little off but I promise I'll make it up to you. Whatever you want to do tomorrow night, name it and we'll do it."

"I can't tomorrow," she sighed heavily. "My dad's boat is docking and we're supposed to have this welcome back dinner, just the two of us."

"So then the night after," Lucas decided.

"Your bi-weekly father, sons Thursday night pizza and basketball."

"Damn," Lucas quietly swore. "I forgot that was this week," he admitted.

"And you don't want to cancel because the three of you are finally able to co-exist in one room without someone throwing a punch," Peyton dutifully reminded.

"Then we'll do it Friday."

"My dad's boat is leaving the day after so we're having a _going away _dinner, just the two of us."

"Saturday?"

"Nathan's party."

"This is ridiculous," Lucas declared, almost laughing at the absurdity of their situation. "It shouldn't be this hard to find a night together."

"Well apparently, it is," Peyton replied and tugged on the hem of his t-shirt. She looked up at him playfully but when she spoke, her words were the exact opposite of her expression. "Just do me a favor, okay... promise me that sometime soon, we'll be alone. No phone calls, no drop ins... just the two of us together."

Once more, Lucas ignored the guilt and instead pasted on a smile. "I promise." Slowly, he leaned down to kiss his girlfriend's upturned lips.

Then, just as his eyes were about to close, he spotted a flash of red walk past him. A girl in a vibrant sweat suit, carrying a familiar pink messenger bag.

He wasn't sure why he looked at all but as he pressed his lips against Peyton's, he couldn't stop staring at the brunette who he'd spent the morning with. Worst of all, as if she felt his eyes on her, Brooke Davis turned and met his stare.

Lucas wasn't sure what was going on, but one thing was for certain... he was in trouble.

----------

"You're in trouble" Bevin declared as she plopped down on the bleachers beside her cheer captain. "How could you say no to a Courtney Ryan party?"

Rolling her eyes heavenward, Brooke said, "Oh come on, Bev... you're giving her way too much credit. Her last blowout at the beach got busted up before midnight. Not to mention," she reminded. "The loser she's dating from Bear Creek brought all his friends and they tried to pick a fight with our entire football team."

"So? Everyone was way drunk by that point. Getting into loud fights is like... a rule or something," the bubbly cheerleader declared. "They get angry and build up all this frustration, then they find some hot girl to release it on," she grinned.

"The way you put it, it sounds more violent than sexy."

"You know what I mean," the blonde said, waving away Brooke's opinion. "They get all hard up."

"Well, whatever," Brooke shrugged. "You go and find some guy to... release... on you, and I'll find something else to do on Friday."

"Please....I've _got_ a college guy. I don't need the boys from Bear Creek," Bevin informed haughtily. "But when was the last you got any?" the blunt cheerleader asked without shame.

"Oh, you know... since none of your damn business," Brooke retorted without heat.

"So then its been awhile," Bevin assumed, undeterred by her friend's obvious desire to avoid the subject.

"Bev, please... " Brooke said when she caught sight of Nathan and Tim walking in on the opposite side of the court. Both had a ball in their hands and were laughing at some unknown joke. "Can we just not talk about this here?"

"Why, because you went out with Nathan like... forever ago?" she asked, glancing between the two brunettes. It was as if some little light went on inside her head and Brooke saw it reflected in her eyes when Bevin asked, "Do you still like him?"

Shaking her head, Brooke replied, "I didn't even like him then... at least not that way. I just don't want Tim and his big mouth spreading around some half truth because he only caught a piece of our conversation."

Curious, Bevin asked, "Since when do you care what people think of you?"

"I _don't _care what people think," Brooke replied, while silently she thought, _I care what one person thinks. _

It was quickly followed by the realization that if she didn't hurry up and build taller walls around herself, trouble would be sure to find her.

"Come on," she said, attempting to distract her surprisingly perceptive friend. "Let's practice."

Bevin seemed to understand what she was trying to do and for whatever reason, she went along with it and allowed herself to be distracted.

----------

Three nights later found Brooke Davis dressed to kill in a black mini skirt, strappy heels and an emerald green halter made of soft silk. She'd curled her thick, chestnut hair so that it fell just beneath shoulders and bounced gently with each step she took. Though currently, it blew lightly around her face as she drove through the streets of Tree Hill with the top down.

After spending an entire week with Lucas, working on their project in class and talking on the phone at night, Brooke decided that she needed to put some distance between the girl he saw and the one everyone else got to see.

She had no idea how he was doing it, but somehow he'd begun to sneak past her defenses.

Sometimes he joked and teased just as easily as she did. Then other times, it was as if he realized what he was doing or who he was doing it with, and his shyness returned. But what really got to Brooke, was the sadness he was able to evoke.

Normally, when someone hurt her feelings, she hurt them right back. She pretended her shell was rock hard and impenetrable. No sad feelings out, no bad feelings in. It was just what she did.

Yet Lucas hurt her on a regular basis with his low expectations and each time he did, it became more and more difficult to pretend that she didn't feel. That she didn't care what he thought. That she wasn't completely disturbed by the fact that in such a short time, he was managing to wiggle his way deeper than anyone else ever had. Or had ever wanted to.

And try as she might, she couldn't figure out what was so different about him that threw her whole attitude out of whack.

Sure, he was cute, but she was surrounded by more just like him. He was nice and smart, but there were plenty of those too. A good basketball player wasn't hard to find in Tree Hill, so that didn't make him unique either. Yet he was... or at least her reaction to him was.

She supposed, in the darkest recesses of her heart, that maybe he got to her because he knew what it was like to be thrown away by a parent and he didn't care. He never went begging to Dan for a chance to know him... he stood his ground, firm in his contempt until his father made the effort to change their non-existent relationship.

Without even realizing it, he knew what it felt like to be Brooke Davis. The only difference was that while Lucas faced it head-on, Brooke avoided her abandonment issues like the plague. She ignored it and waved it all away, pretending that her life was perfect and an object of jealousy.

Little did anyone know that she only saw her parents one week out of each month. And even then, sometimes it was only one parent. Her dad, who had some business to attend to back at his home office, or her mother who wanted to drop off one pile of clothes in exchange for another one.

"This is so stupid," she muttered to herself, shaking the cobwebs away as she sailed past one building after another. "He' just a guy... that's it. Nothing special, nothing new... just a guy," Brooke coached as she found herself approaching the Rivercourt Lucas often talked about.

Oddly enough, she couldn't remember ever coming down that way before. Yet there she was, cruising by while trying to convince herself that it was purely a coincidence.

So she told herself that he wouldn't be there. It was a Friday night, so why wouldn't he be out and about with his girlfriend or brother?

_Let me feel. I don't care if I break down. Let me fall. Even if I hit the ground_

Brooke wasn't sure if she was happy or disappointed when she saw him... playing against imaginary phantoms as he ran all over the court before coming in for a lay-up.

She wanted to keep driving by. To speed up until he was nothing but a dot in her review mirror.

Which of course meant that stopping was inevitable.

"Hey." He smiled as she got out of the car. From the first step she took towards him, Lucas was visibly pleased to see her there. He held the ball between his hands, toying with it absently and watched her slow approach.

Brooke noticed how sweaty he was as the white t-shirt he wore clung to his chest. A discarded gray hoodie rested on a rickety old picnic table just beyond the court and as Lucas closed the gap between them, he let go of the ball in favor of picking up the sweater to wipe his face.

"How satisfying can it be to beat yourself?" she asked, arching one perfectly shaped brow.

Lucas grinned. "You'd be surprised."

He tried to be discreet but Brooke caught the subtle pass he made up and down her body. She told herself that the chill she felt was the night air and not a reaction to his blue eyed gaze.

Yet she still felt the need to put a little distance between them. To break the moment.

"A girlfriend, a best friend and brother but you still can't find anything better to do on a Friday night besides play basketball."

Just as she planned, the casual comment achieved the desired effect. At the mention of Peyton, his grin slipped away.

"They all have other things to do tonight," Lucas shrugged, feigning nonchalance. "Looks like you do too."

Brooke returned his shrug. "That's because no one asked me to come out and play basketball," she couldn't help but tease.

Though he responded with a smile, Brooke sensed the change in him almost immediately. As if his mind wandered elsewhere and couldn't return. She knew it stemmed from what she said and had everything to do with Peyton. More specifically, the fact that he was standing there, enjoying someone else's company.

At least that was the impression she received every other time a silence fell over him in the middle of one of their study sessions.

"Well, I guess I'll leave you to it," Brooke decided and turned to walk away. Given the way he often clammed up, she didn't expect an argument from Lucas and she certainly hadn't expected the feel of his hand closing around her wrist.

Glancing downward, she studied the sight of his hand before pinning him with a curious expression.

"Sorry, I..." he stuttered, releasing his hold.

There was uncertainty now. A look on his face that told Brooke he didn't know what he was doing anymore than she did. So she spoke. Just said the first words that came to her mind despite the effect she knew they'd have.

"I like the water. The river...the beach...even swimming pools."

If he was confused, Lucas didn't show it.

"I like to sit in front of them after I've done something that I'm not proud of because every time the water moves, I feel like it's carrying away all my bad deeds."

_And if I cry a little. Die a little. At least I know I lived, just a little_

She supposed that maybe she was giving him another out. A way to do what he wanted without worrying about the consequences. A way to see for herself if he was feeling even an ounce of what she did.

"Would I sound like a total idiot if I said that was kind of beautiful?"

Brooke shrugged, staring up at him. "Depends on your definition of beautiful," she murmured as he slowly leaned in. She saw his eyes close a half second before her own lashes fluttered down. Then she felt a soft whisper against her lips. The ghost of a kiss.

Then it was gone and with it, Lucas took away a brick from the wall enclosing her.

"Now you know," she quietly spoke. "You don't have to be curious anymore. You just have to sit on that picnic table in front of the water and in a few minutes it'll carry this moment away."

But it was Brooke who left.

When her car was gone and the dust her tires kicked up had settled, Lucas asked, "What if I don't want it to?"


End file.
